I’m Not Judging, I’m Just Saying: Girl Please!

Last night I took the time to view 48 Hours on CBS. Let me start with this: I do not know the Anthony Family, was not around when Caylee was killed, and do not know who killed her. All that I have to say is straight forward, unadulterated, and purely my observations of one thing: 30 days without contact with a 3 year old. I have one thing to say to Casey Anthony, to not tell anyone your child is missing for 30 days…. GIRL PLEASE!

A childhood friend of mine commented on my Facebook post of information referring to this case. My comment is what the impetus for this posting:

I don't know if she did it or not, no one does except her and God. What I can say is that it all looks fiiiishy. You and I know that if our children are gone past the time we tell them to be home we are off the looking for them. The emotions you go through are usually as follows: 1) anger, "you should be home when you were told", 2) concern, "where... Read More is 'x'?" "did something happen? and then, 3) anxiety/panic, after 10-15 minutes and them not appearing you begin going into the worst place you can think. How could this Mom not call the police? Her mother had to cal AFTER 30 days. I SMELL AN OCEAN LINER FULL OF ROTTEN FISH!!

As the parent of a ten year old boy, I find it hard to allow him to run the neighborhood without knowing where he his going, with whom he will be playing, and when he will return. I remember one day, last year, in which he left the obligatory “within ear shot” range, had gone with friends to another street in the subdivision, and I just about lost it. I bought him a watch so he could come home at the appropriate time to check in. By the time I had to come out of the house, he was past that time, coupled with the fact that he was not in “ear shot” of me yelling for him, you have the perfect storm for my mind to run wild. Stepping off of the front porch, I took a breathe, attempted to gather my thoughts about where he might be, with whom may have been, and then, began my search. An avalanche of thoughts hit me at one point: what did he have one from head to toe? Where did he say he was going? What is the most likely place he could have been? After looking for him for all of 2-3 minutes I returned to the house and about 30 seconds after I got in, he bounced into the house. Relieved, I found myself overcome by anger, frustration, and anxiety because he had no idea how worried I had become in the matter of 10-15 minutes.

For the parent of a 3 year old to wait 30 days seems to be so out of line it boggles my mind. My son was playing with friends in our neighborhood and did not report in on time and I almost had a coronary. I did not go back in the house to call friends and plan a night out. Why? Motherly instinct kicked in and my worry about his well-being would not let me do anything but be concerned for him. How you have a 3 year old child missing for more than 5 minutes and not go into panic is beyond me. How you have a 3 year old missing for 12 minutes and not call authorities, is beyond me. How you have a 3 year old “held” by a nanny, and not call authorities is beyond me? And how you are not the person who calls the authorities about your missing child is a smelly situation all together. George and Cindy Anthony, Casey’s parents, have some soul searching to do. There is no place in my mind that I can go which would allow me to make excuses for a child of mine to go 30 days without knowing the location their child. It is not normal.

The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children has been in the business of looking for children for 25 years. On their website, they have resources for parents and guardians which in includes what to do if your child is missing. Not surprising to this writer, is that the following is prominent on the page telling people what to do if their child is missing. You might be surprised and surely Casey would be to, but here it is: “ACT IMMEDIATELY if you believe that your child is missing.”  Each day an average of 2,185 children are reported missing which equates to 797,500 children under the age of 18 per year. The Statistics break down like this according to the US Deartment of Justice in 2002:

• 797,500 children (younger than 18) were reported missing in a one-year period of time studied resulting in an average of 2,185 children being reported missing each day.
• 203,900 children were the victims of family abductions.
• 58,200 children were the victims of non-family abductions.
• 115 children were the victims of “stereotypical” kidnapping. (These crimes involve someone the child does not know or someone of slight acquaintance, who holds the child overnight, transports the child 50 miles or more, kills the child, demands ransom, or intends to keep the child permanently.)

[Andrea J. Sedlak, David Finkelhor, Heather Hammer, and Dana J. Schultz. U.S. Department of Justice. "National Estimates of Missing Children: An Overview" in National Incidence Studies of Missing, Abducted, Runaway, and Thrownaway Children. Washington, DC: Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention, Office of Justice Programs, U.S. Department of Justice, October 2002, page 5.]

 In this information age, there is no reason for inaction on the part of any person charged with the care of a child. Just in case, there is someone who does not have information on what to do I would be derelict in my duty as a parent and child advocate, if I did not share the following information:

What to Do:

• If your child is missing from home, search the house checking closets, piles of laundry, in and under beds, inside large appliances, and inside vehicles, including trunks—wherever a child may crawl or hide.

• If you still cannot find your child, immediately call your local law enforcement agency.

• If your child disappears in a store, notify the store manager or security office. Then immediately call your local law-enforcement agency. Many stores have a Code Adam plan of action— if a child is missing in the store, employees immediately mobilize to look for the missing child.

• When you call law enforcement, provide your child's name, date of birth, height, weight, and any other unique identifiers such as eyeglasses and braces. Tell them when you noticed that your child was missing and what clothing he or she was wearing.

• Request that your child's name and identifying information be immediately entered into the National Crime Information Center (NCIC) Missing Person File.

• After you have reported your child missing to law enforcement, call the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children on our toll-free telephone number: 1-800-THE-LOST (1-800-843-5678). Or you can use our Live Hotline to talk to NCMEC through our web site.

Adapted from Just in Case...Missing. Copyright© 1985 National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC). All rights reserved.

Children are the most defenseless beings on the face of this earth, which is my opinion. As an adoptive parent, former social worker, and advocate for children this case begs the question, “Who is caring for the least of them?” In the case of Caylee Anthony, from my view, it was not her mother. With all the excuses and stories she has told, all I can say to her is “Girl please!”